Home

Your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
Psalm 139:14b

I am home, or at least I am now living in our house in Chiang Mai. I struggle to call it home just because I’m the only one here. When the rest of my family joins me on August 4th, it’ll then be home. I realize “home” has many definitions so let me refer to the one I mean which is the 3rd on the list of definitions from the http://www.thefreedictionary.com site:

1. A place where one lives; a residence.
2. The physical structure within which one lives, such as a house or apartment.
3. A dwelling place together with the family or social unit that occupies it; a household.

Our home (defined as #1 and #2) is super comfortable. I have nothing to complain about. The folks who lived here for us while we were away blessed us by taking care of our place well. They even left me with fruit juices and salad dressings in the fridge – YES! (Thanks, Todds! My stomach is tickled with delight.) =) I liked our home before and still do. I particularly love our bedroom with windows on all 3 sides. In the morning, I love hearing the birds chirping away to welcome the day. It is a blessing to be here.

When I left a year ago, I had 17 friends that I gathered together to honour and say goodbye to. Of those same 17 people, only 4 or 5 are in town at this time. Because school is out until August, most of them left for their home countries or are on vacation. A few left for good and now that I’m back here where we used to be, it’s been grieving my heart. It isn’t hard to see that being without family and most of my friends, I am left with our dog (god spelled backwards) Fudge, and Papa God. =D

I’ve only been here 5 days so I’m still adjusting to being back. I have to catch up on my online course homework that I couldn’t do while packing and traveling to get here so I need to be diligent to study. As I deal with my grief and get caught up with my school work, I hope to learn where the Lord is taking me next.

I’d always enjoyed my quiet moments with Papa God. In the past, there were times when I woke up at 5:30 to have it. Prior to getting very busy before coming here, I set aside a day in the week to sleep and just be with Him. Once a month for the past 3 years, I’d left my family for 24 hours and holed up somewhere quiet and secluded. I’d always looked forward to it. I realized that with my needing to come back here to Thailand sooner to renew my visa, I would inadvertently have this extended time with Papa God. YES! It feels so odd with my loved ones missing and I miss them but I know when this time is over, I would have learned a LOT and truly cherish it. I know I want, and need, to learn to stay connected with the Lord outside of my dedicated times in the past. Max Lucado described it well when he said:

Acknowledge God’s presence everywhere you go,
As you stand in line to register your car, think,
Thank you, Lord, for being here.
In the grocery store as you shop,
Your presence, my King, I welcome.
As you wash the dishes, worship your Maker.

I've functioned with dualism. I’ve spent most of my days where although some were committed to God in prayer, most of the time was spent oblivious of Him. I no longer want this. I’d like to be 100% aware and plugged into God at all times. It is a tall order but I realize it is as much my desire as His! This is why I need to be alone for a season, to learn, to be obsessed, and to dance with the Lord, as I alluded to in the previous post.



I don’t know what it’ll look like and I need lots of prayers because I may very well function out of old habits. BUT, I do know it’ll be glorious and I’ll feel like I’ve come “home” as defined below. Amen.

4. To the center or heart of something; deeply: ex. Your comments really hit home.