Receiving

Times with our oldest: 22 year old son,
Evan, were precious.

Before I left for Toronto, Eng gave me a gift card with over $300 in it. He said it was given to him but he didn't have a chance to use it all while he was here. There was an expiry date on it which necessitated its immediate use. He also said I should shop and just use it any way I wanted to. Pleased to have money to spend, I determined to shop and use it wisely. For the past three Sundays, Evan and I had gone to the malls after church and used the card for our lunches and for shopping. (Sundays are the days when my siblings visit my father so it is a good time to be out as he has company.)

The first time we went shopping, I tried to buy something for Evan but he wouldn't let me. Even when we did find a great looking $20 shirt on sale, he didn't want it. He said it was too expensive. He said he wanted a shirt from a second hand store. Buying some body scrubs for me, a shop clerk's eyes smiled when we explained our predicament that we were trying to use up all the money in the card. She said she'd have a "great and easy" time using the money we had. My nephew said the same thing. It shouldn't be hard to spend all that money.

So the question was, "Why were we walking back and forth in the mall and having difficulty trying to buy something?" I was in a shoe store and tried on a pair that was on sale for $89.99. I needed a pair, it looked great and it felt good on my feet. Still, I didn't buy it because I couldn't justify spending that kind of money on a pair of footwear! We kept looking and spent just over $100 on our first shopping day.

Times with Tatay, my father, were gifts.

By our third time out, we finally exhausted our funds. I'd spent it on our two lunches, clothing for Eng, Eric, Eli, and Ethan, a book for Evan, and other hygienic items for Evan and I. Proud of ourselves that we got our task accomplished, Evan then took out his gift card. He said it was for $80 from a leather shop that he wouldn't buy anything from. They sold footwear, belts, and wallets. I said I needed a wallet so we went to buy one. On the way there, I talked to Evan about learning how to receive. I told him I wanted to buy him the $20 shirt from our first day out but he wouldn't accept it because of the cost. When we got to the store, I couldn't find a wallet I liked so I started looking at their footwear. Before too long, I found one that had a 50% sale on its tag. It was all leather, it looked good, and it felt great. The price? It was almost $100!

Really? It was the second pair I liked and tried in three weeks and they cost almost the same? Was that a coincidence? Did I need to learn something? (Obviously, the prices of stuff in Toronto went way up while we weren't living here!) Could I receive that as a gift if the giver felt I deserved it? Just like Eng, Evan said I could use the card on anything. So what was my problem? My own words were still fresh on my lips! "You need to learn to receive. How can the Lord give you anything if you won't open your hands to receive it?

Well, I am learning as I am now the owner of a super comfortable, leather pair of sandals. Yesterday, our family friend insisted that she wanted to do my nails: hands and feet! I let her even though it took a long time and she re-did my right hands' fingers at 1:00 a.m.! Last night, Evan and I watched a movie with popcorn and drinks. Our outing cost us $3.00 just for the parking because of a coupon I received.

Our Lord, because of the way He loves, is extravagant, generous, and giving. Even though Jesus said it is more blessed to give than to receive, there is grace also needed to receive well. May we not miss out on our blessings because of our inability to receive.